"I had a full life, and I had fun."
-Sister Arlene Melder
Sister Arlene Melder was born on a farm in central Wisconsin, the oldest child, with her brother following four years later. With such a small family, everyone had to pitch in and work together. Sister Arlene remembers milking cows, mowing the lawn, driving the horses for haying, helping in the garden and around the house. It was a lot of work, prompting her to say at the time, “I’ll never marry a farmer.” But in the midst of it all, she remembers having fun.
Sister Arlene attended the local Catholic school staffed by the Franciscan Sisters of Perpetual Adoration. After high school, she got a job as a nursing assistant in the maternity ward at Marshfield Hospital, which was about twenty-five miles away from home. Because of the distance, she had to board at the hospital with other girls. She came home every two weeks for a weekend, and also took off summers to help on the farm. Sister Arlene loved working at the hospital with the mothers and the babies.
From early on, Sister Arlene was a very spiritual person. She and a friend got up most mornings at 6 a.m. to attend 6:30 a.m. Mass. Her aunt was an FSPA, so when Arlene was 16, her dad asked if she wanted to go to the convent. She said, “no.” However, when she was 20, her good friend informed her that she was going to enter a convent and indicated that maybe Arlene might also have a vocation. She suggested that Arlene go to St. Rose Convent and ask if she could stay. Laughingly, Sister Arlene recounted, “I thought maybe that’s what I should do since I had just broken up with my boyfriend. I had no idea how religious life worked. But I seriously believed that I did want to commit my whole life to God.” So, she went to the door and asked if she could stay. Surprisingly, the answer was “yes.” That same day she gave up her red coat and got outfitted in black attire. She laughs, “I didn’t even give notice at the hospital.” And thus began an adventure she has never regretted.
When asked what she would like to do for ministry, Sister Arlene replied that she liked to sew and cook, so she was assigned to be a homemaker. At first she worked in the stitching room. She remembers sitting at a sewing machine and looking out the window at the chapel and feeling so at peace. After that first year, she was assigned to work in food service, first at St. Rose Convent, then at Villa St. Joseph, and then at a number of different places, mainly in large institutional settings.
Sister Arlene especially enjoyed her assignment to head up the food service department at the hospital in Idaho Falls. There were 20 sisters there. On their days off, some would go on trips to Yellowstone and the Tetons. Sister Arlene particularly recalls the trip they took to Sun Valley. The sisters were still in their long habits. It was minus 18 degrees and they went up the ski lift to see the view. It must have been quite a sight for the skiers! At another time, they went snowmobiling. She also developed her lifelong love for fishing in Idaho.
Later, after another five-year stint at FSPA’s Villa St. Joseph, Sister Arlene was ready for a change. Two sister friends invited her to join them in establishing a house of prayer. They spent mornings in prayer and quiet contemplation, and afternoons working the 3 p.m. to 11 p.m. shift at the nearby hospital. Eventually, she was trained in pastoral care. She loved this ministry which she then did for twenty years at various places.
Soon FSPA leadership was looking for more ministries to the underserved. Laughing, Sister Arlene recounted, “They gave me and five other sisters a station wagon and told us to go out and see what we could find.” They eventually ended up at Claxton, Georgia, where FSPA had been previously. The Glenmary Missionaries staffed two parishes there and welcomed the help of the sisters and formed community with them. Sister Arlene served in pastoral care in the hospital. She recalls, “There were very few Catholics, and a lot of Southern Baptists and people disadvantaged by systems. They taught me an openness and acceptance of everyone, and how to manage in hard times. They would often say, ‘The Lord will take care of me.’”
Soon sisters were being encouraged to learn more theology, spirituality and personal growth. Sister Arlene eagerly engaged in those opportunities. She spent a year in the Chaplains Religious Enrichment Development Operation program in Spokane, Washington, which offered all of the above in the midst of a community of men and women religious from all over the world. She loved the experience! Now, more well-equipped, she returned to Wisconsin to serve in various places in ministries of pastoral care, home health, and hospice. She loved visiting with people.
Around the year 2000, Sister Arlene was diagnosed with glaucoma, and seven years later, she moved into retirement at St. Rose Convent. This was, and is, a major transition for her. When she first arrived, she remained very active, enjoying photography, making cards for the gift shop, tending flowers, visiting family and going fishing when she could. But now she no longer has the energy or eyesight to do those things.
“I am learning to accept the challenges of aging. There’s a lot of letting go involved. I try to do it gracefully without getting frustrated.” Help comes in the form of prayer, exercising every day, listening to audiobooks and seeing a spiritual director. “I’ve had a full life and when I get disgusted with my condition, I think, ‘Well, I sure had fun!’”
1-Minute Meditation: Sister Arlene's Photography
About Wells of Wisdom
Communities of Catholic Sisters realize what a wealth of wisdom there is among us; it is too rich to be ignored. So in “Wells of Wisdom," author Sister Karen Lueck features a Franciscan Sister of Perpetual Adoration in her golden years who is willing to share some of her wisdom with a world desperately in need of it.
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